I don’t know about you, but dates don’t happen very often around here. From the beginning of our marriage, we have lived 4 hours, 7 hours, and now, over 30 hours away from family! Since we are both the type of people who hate asking for help, we just end up taking the kids with us wherever we go. We don’t mind, since we have two pretty cool kids!
We haven’t gone out, alone, since before Vivian was born and I have noticed that we had been needing a date for some time. Is there ever a time in your marriage that you just feel “off”? Do you ever feel like you haven’t really talked without a kid squealing or tugging on your shirt? Have you noticed that all your meals are cold when you get around to eating or you have to stop between bites to pick something up or feed someone else?
These are some of the typical moments of motherhood that I really don’t mind, but I also know it’s nice to have a break once in a while…it’s good for both the mama and the marriage.
Ryan had the day off on Saturday (which is rare with camp life), so I decided to surprise him with a date…kidless! I lined up a babysitter and had a few ideas for the afternoon. I have come to realize that we aren’t “plan” people. We like having a flexible schedule so we can just go with whatever feels right at the time.
After dropping the kids off, we stopped at an antique shop that I have been dying to visit ever since we moved here. It never seemed right with the kids…somehow a toddler in a glass-filled shop causes me much anxiety!
I love going to antique shops with Ryan because it sparks so many conversations. We chat about how certain pieces would look in our home, wonder who owned it before, and dream about the life it had before sitting on a dusty shelf in a shop in Arizona.
After a while, we headed to a new fish and chips place in town. The food was delicious and the company even better! (I can’t even put into words how amazing it felt to just eat)
I gave Ryan the option of bowling or miniature golf, but since we flew through two games of bowling, we did both! It was nice to laugh and flirt and feel like dating kids again! I love it when we are walking hand-in-hand and we start talking about our girls. It’s definitely fun to be alone but it sure feels good to know that we have them in our lives.
Yes, I was number 2. And yes, I killed Ryan!
…yes, I’m still number 2…
He may have gotten a hole in one, but I still beat him! I guess it was just my day!
After some more antique shops and thrift stores, we got a text saying Vivian was really struggling. She is still refusing to take a bottle. I know, I should try harder. But I am so overjoyed with finally being able to breastfeed that I kinda don’t care! These times will be gone way too fast. I’m enjoying them while they are here.
In the end, we had a whole three and a half hours to ourselves…just the two of us. It was a long overdue, much needed afternoon. I wanted to share it here because it was a special day for me. It wasn’t anything formal or planned out, but it was just what we needed.
I have realized that these dates are so important for Ryan and me. I want to make it a priority to get a babysitter and spend some time laughing, goofing off, and just being together more often. Being a mom is a beautiful, incredible thing. I wouldn’t trade it for anything in the world! But I have to remember that I am not only a mommy…I am also a wife. I want to be able to put down the toys and diapers once in a while to spend time with my love. I can’t forget how important it is.
On that note, I told Myra that mommy and daddy were going on a date and she said “Myra date too!” She was a little jealous but it made me look forward to the days when Ryan will take our daughters on dates. That is something that I know will be so important to me, too. I hope our girls know and understand the love that their daddy has for them. They are loved dearly and I hope they never forget that.
Do you have any suggestions for our next date day?